Saturday, May 30, 2009

Saturday May 30, 2009

I'll start with the questions from what cheer! :

How do you and your sisterwives feel about birth control? Does the church take a particular position on this that influences you?

The church does not allow birth control except for women who doctors say should not have anymore babies for health reasons. This is so everyone takes it very seriously when they commit to each other and for when they have sex. I will admit that when I came here I really had not thought about sex a lot and even when I wanted to be part of the family and marry Steve I still was not really thinking about it. That is sort of naive but when your use to sex being so casual with your friends and at school with the way teachers talk about it its easy to not take it so seriously.

With birth control it takes away from the commitment two people are suppose to have when they have sex. You can just have your good time and then walk away from each other the next day and that is it. It takes something really special and makes it nothing more than just like a nice way to spend a night.

So I wrote about my feelings on this once before and I don't want a big argument so don't everyone try to think so much about what I write next, okay? (-:

On my wedding night I really had not thought about everything so much and was like sure I wanted to be with Steve on my wedding night. I did not have to be with him that night and no one forced me to, it was my choice. But I wanted to have a wedding night like anyone else. So when things started with Steve it really did hit me right then how serious it was what I was doing because it wasn't like we were just being together we were together and maybe making a baby and EVERYTHING in my life was changing in that moment. It wasn't just like I had a big wedding party and now it was I wanted another party time it was life changing serious and I knew in that moment that I could not just walk away if I just wanted to.

It makes you take marriage much more serious and it makes you really think about it if you want to leave and thats good because it makes people work out problems together instead of just walking away from them.

If you go back and read some of what I posted about how the church started it makes sense. They use to be all free love and everything and no one was committed to anyone and it made a mess. This rule makes sense so the mistakes that happened before don't happen again.

How many children I want is not something the church teaches about but I am thinking I want four or five right now and maybe later I might want more. Right now I am only wanting to start with one!

I liked the other question and lol'd on it! Steve is not always wanting to do things every night. He works hard and is sometimes really tired and just needs to sleep. I've had a few nights with him now where we just sleep and then I am up before he is so nothing happens. Same with Shari and Christie. We are normal this way like anyone else I guess.

Christie getting pregnant and nursing is just Christie I guess. She was nursing Eric when she got pregnant with Emmy so its not like she never did this before. I'm really happy for her because she says she is never happier than when she is pregnant and I can see her being a little more peaceful this week so I guess it is true. I read a little and some of my friends on email say that nursing does not prevent babies in all women and one of my friends said she got pregnant with her twins three months after her first baby so it is not a rule that nursing will stop you from getting pregnant. Some people say that right after you have had a baby is the best time to get pregnant because your body is already ready to be pregnant.

The weather here cooled off and last night was actually cold. We adults and Stevie stayed up late to watch a movie and then I was chilly so Steve and Shari asked me to come sleep with them. It was nice just to be cuddled and that was all that happened so there is another night when we just sleep.

The chicks are doing well and so far I am blessed that none of them have died. I was told to expect that maybe four or five would die and all of them seem fine. They love the cool weather and we have them all out to the coop for the day so they can play in the sun. The girls are with them all the time so they don't have to worry about the cats.

I am not going back to regular college in the fall. I don't like all of the studying and reading and I have real problems with some of the teachers being so political all the time. I want to learn to be a better cook so Christie suggested I go to a culinary arts college and I decided to say yes to it and then Steve and Shari said yes to paying the tuition for me. It will be almost a year to get my PCA degree and I have to do six weeks at a restarant at the end of the classes to finish the degree. The classes start in September and I will be going to the school to sign up on Tuesday. I think it will be a lot of fun!


  1. Megan, I get what you mean about sex being so casual. When you take birth control out of the situation then there is no such thing as "casual sex" and you truly have to weigh your feelings toward the person you have sex with. I can also understand that you didn't appreciate the gravitas of your wedding night until you were in the moment due to our collectively cavalier cultural sexual attitudes. When my late wife and I elected to have a child it required us to have unprotected sex for the first time in our relationship. This was simultaneously frightening and romantic in that we essentially renewed our vows to each other that night. In summary, your commentaries on this topic are a condemnation of our culture.

    You will enjoy your cooking school and maybe you can post some of the recipes you learn.

  2. What about if you get pregnant? Will you still go to school?

  3. Birth Control is a hot topic in Plural Families :P It ALWAYS starts an argument..hehe :) Addressed nicely! Just had to add that..I like to believe it's like the "Pro-Life vs. Pro-Abortion (or whatever it is called)" Argument..It gets people fired up and fired up quickly..That AND should we use modern medicines..I have been on the rough end of a stick for that:)

    Have a lovely day!

    In Love

  4. Megan,

    I am SO excited that you are going to Culinary Arts College! I think it's a wonderful idea.

    Once again your family is a shining example of how Plural Families support each other! It's wonderful to have a family who supports your interests and dreams! :)

    Blessings, M

  5. I love to cook too! I'm a whiz in the kitchen. I may take a class or two myself at some point in time. Not right now, tho. :-)

    As for Christie and her getting pregnant again while breastfeeding, it happens ALL the time. People have to remember that breastfeeding does not mean 100% that you can't get pregnant. Thus far, it has indeed worked for ME, in MY life but I am only one woman lol. I know many others who could NEVER trust breastfeeding to hold off ovulation...

    I love your family! Time for me too catch up on your blog.

  6. "When you take birth control out of the situation then there is no such thing as "casual sex" "

    By the same token, sex with birth control is nothing but casual, or in other words, recreational. Obviously it was created to feel good, and we are supposed to like it, but when its done with latex and other man-made materials for the sole purpose of closing the womb, the only thing left is recreational sex. Children are an heritage of the Lord, the fruits of the womb are a reward (Psalms 127). Scripturally, only the Lord opens and closes the womb Genesis 20:18, 29:31). I must admit that until recently, my views on child prevention were personal. I was asked for my opinion on the matter by a sister that has commented on this blog, and instead of referencing scripture as I normally would, I told her that I felt it was unnatural, and in my home, my wife and I calculated ovulations, etc. if we felt we needed to avoid conception, and that I personally would feel deviant having sex with latex. I wasn't withholding the above scripture in my answer, I just never had any reason to study the matter prior to now. A cursory study of the scriptures shows that children are a blessing, it is the Lord that is to decide when the womb is fruitful or barren, etc. and I could find NO scripture allowing for child prevention in the form of anything other than abstinence. In closing, in regards to the above comments on abortion, this sisters' reasoning for "birth control" was *exactly* the reasoning used for abortions: it's *her* body, she isn't ready for a baby, no man is going to tell her what to do , etc.