Saturday, July 31, 2010

July 31, 2010

Thanks for the good questions! Sometimes things are just what they are and I don't know what to write about so this is a nice way for me to find something to say.

Shari was homeschooling the kids wasn't she? who is going to do that now that she is gone, or will they go to a public school?

Lauren and Hannah will be doing some homeschooling with us and they will be going to a small school that a church family runs starting after the harvest is all done. The little kids we can homeschool and Macy says she will get her teaching certificate for this state so she can teach and we can have a private school. She can do that mostly by mail here so it is not a big deal.

What type of denomination do you and your family belong to? If you do not belong to any mainstream denomination what at the doctorines of your faith?

Our church is supposed to be like a old school Methodist church. Not United Methodist but it is supposed to be like the Evangelical Brethren and I don't know a lot about that. I know we really have our own thing and then the three main congregations do some different stuff. Like this one meets ever Sunday and we have a church and my old one met once a month at people's homes.

I never would have imagined when I first started reading this blog, that Shari would the one to leave. It is the disruption of a long standing relationship, and the separation of a mother from her children. It makes me sad.

I know that is not a question but I wanted to say something about it. I love Christie and Steve but I really would NEVER done this without Shari here. She was like the rock in the family that made me feel safe and at the same time she was really into the rules and all. Things are way more less stressed without her here but it also doesn't feel as permanent as it use to be. We are all going to work hard to be a good family but having her leave is hard because I know Steve is the man and all that but Shari was the head of the house for real and her being gone took a lot of the life out of the house. I really miss her and wish she would come home but just be less stressed if she did.

Next week I have to be back in California to do my final exam and get my diploma for cooking school. I'm pretty sure I will do fine but hope to get a prayer from everyone too! Thanks!

Saturday, July 24, 2010

July Update

One of my chat friends said that our old normal is being replaced by a new normal and that is the best way to say that. Shari being gone made us see how stressed things were for her and for us because when she left all that stress did too. Steve is still hurting from Shari leaving but then he is more relaxed and you can see it and his blood pressure is down when he went to see the doctor!

It came up so here is an update on everyone now and here goes:

Steve is 45 and lives here and commutes to his work in California. He wants to move his business closer to where we live and is trying to find jobs near here.

Christie is 30 and has two babies, Eric who is 2 1/2 and Emily/Emmy who is 1 and she is due with another baby in September. She is saying she needs to start working again to make money to make up for what had to get paid to Shari and might have to get a job after the baby is born.

I am 19 going to be 20 in a month and I have two babies Patty and Laura who are both alomst 3 mos. I have about 160 chickens now and get $4.50 a dozen eggs and that is doing really well and I might go to 200 chickens next year.

Macy is 22 and is due around the end of November.

Lauren is 15 and Hannah is 12 and they are Steve and Shari's daughters and are going to stay here with us after the divorce is all done. Lauren was supposed to be the one going to college but now she is thinking she wants a family like her sister did and we will see what happens.

There it is.

I know I probably said this a lot already but with Shari gone things are more relaxed in the house. It's like this big tension is gone and we didn't know what it was until it was gone. We all still miss her a lot but I guess what we want is for her to be here but without all the stuff that was making things not so great.

About my school I have to go to California next month and do my final exams and then do my final presentation and they are going to let me graduate and I will be a chef! I really want to have something else I can do to make money if I need it and being a chef will really help. I don't talk about my cooking much but my cooking really got better once I knew what to do. My mom never taught me how to cook because with her cooking meant you open a can or put something in the microwave. It was so cool the first time I made a cake and not from a box! It's still like this whole new world to go in the kitchen and see things and not just see the ingredients but see what you can make with them.

That is about it for right now. If anyone has any questions that would be cool because I don't really know what else to write about right now.

Have a Happy Saturday!

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Saturday morning

Thank you all for the nice things you have said and for the prayers! I really, really appreciate it!

There were a lot of questions on the blog and email and I am sorry if I don't get them all.

The Pastor from where Shari is now called yesterday and told us she is okay and that she is not going to use a lawyer out of the church. She will accept the 20% of everything she has a right to and then leave Lauren and Hannah with us. Shari is going to leave the church and the Pastor said she agreed to see a therapist too to help her adjust to things.

Yeah I think that having a fourth wife and a third wife (me) was not so good a idea for Shari. I know she wanted more kids in the house but then I really think she meant she wanted to have the kids. And then when me and Macy came here we got a lot of attention and that probably hurt Shari and it showed. It sucks because for me and Macy there is no going back on things to make it good for Shari and if I could do that I would.

She was really upset and we all got use to it and I hate to say it but you notice it more because she left. Now things are so calm that you really see how upset it was before. I mean she used to give everyone hard looks sometimes like she was way pissed at you and then you'd ask what was wrong and she'd say nothing and play it off and you'd be thinking you imagined it.

Menopause is probably part of what happened with her and maybe it is hormones? I don't know. But I am listening to people talk about it and it could be that she was upset that she just could not have babies anymore and that was a big thing. I really don't know and am just saying things here and don't mean to make it gossip.

It is sunny and warm today but not too hot and we have bad weather tomorrow so there is a lot to do and I need to go. I hope you all have a nice Saturday.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Update

Shari really isn't coming back and she is making that really clear to everyone. She was at Stevie's house in California and then went up to Portland with a friend of hers. I don't know what all happened but she is leaving everything and even Lauren and Hannah. She says they are better off here but then some of this is Shari wanting to be alone I think. I love her and care about her but I think this is being selfish not thinking about her kids and it was really wrong the way she just left like she did.
We think she was thinking about this and planning it for a few months and maybe it would have helped if she had said something? Even if it didn't help it would have been easier for everyone when this happened if it was not the big surprise it is.
Our new Pastor has been over a few times and has been really nice to talk to but it is sad this is how we get to know him.
That's all I want to write right now. Thank you all for the prayers!

Monday, July 5, 2010

Sad news

This last week Steve and Shari had a lot of arguments and fighting and I am not sure what all of it was about but yesterday Shari stayed home from church and when we all got home she was gone and left a message saying she was going to her sister's place in Oregon. She called Steve last night and told him on the phone she was going to get a divorce. Shari is legally married to Steve so that means a legal divorce. Shari's daughters are here with us and they are really broken up about this. The rest of us are too.
I know some of what Shari was upset about was moving out of California and being away from Stevie and so many people she knows. I think there are other things too but I think this is the biggest problem and I don't know what to say about it.
Steve is really upset and depressed and went fishing today and was gone most of the morning. He came back with no fish so I think he just wanted private time to think is all. We're all giving him space right now and we're all kind of shocked with this too. Christie was seriously quiet and that is totally not like her to be that way and I know it is bothering her.
There really isn't anything else worth mentioning right now just this and we can use some prayer for healing right now. Thanks.