I can't sleep. I am guessing it is the pregnancy thing or something. I'm totally wide awake.
I haven't really posted a lot in a while so this is a good time for it.
The best thing lately is Patty is walking. She started standing at around nine months and now at almost 1 year she is walking. I mean it is not like she is walking all over, but she can put her hands on things and walk around or if I hold her hand she can walk a while. Laura is still crawling and is wonderful and my wonderful little angel!
Christie is crazy busy with her work. Macy and Steve are trying for another baby.
Tab and Stevie are doing better after being here a while. Tab got a job of his own and says they will have their own place as soon as he can afford it but for now it is really nice having them live here.
My friend Carlee lost her baby. I can't even tell you how sad that has made her family. The doctor said there was no way that baby would have lived so I guess it is merciful but you still ask why even have that happen at all?
I'm horny. Everyone tells me it is hormones and all but it is a little too much for me. I mean it is nice that I am finally feeling very positive about sex but it is also kind of strange because my mind is one way and my body is another.
Marcus wrote to me. It was a really nice letter! He attached pictures of his new house and his girlfriend (cute!) and I am praying for his happiness.
Snow is boring.
I've had a couple people send me serious letters about national health care. I guess my whole opinion of it is if it is so wonderful then 1) why do people have to be forced to buy it? and 2) why is it the very first thing that Congress and Obama did was make sure they could keep their health care? And now like a whole bunch of unions and states and all are wanting to be exempt from it?
I mean if the people who know the most about it won't use it then I am thinking it won't be all that great for me either.
Canada looks like they might legalize poly! That would be so awesome! I am thinking if it gets legalized there then it won't be a long time before it is legal here, too.
Having one baby is waaaaaay better than having two! This has been so easy compared to the last time! My feet don't hurt, my boobs feel better, I am not ripping stretch marks all the time, and I don't feel as big as a whale. If it is just one at a time after this I will be so happy!!!
The chickens are happy and doing well. I have some chicks already and the summer will probably see 60-100 new babies in the yard! That also means I will need to sell some chickens soon and that is cool with tourist season coming up.
It is 2:24am and time to go to bed even if I can't sleep.
I would LOVE some questions! Ask me ANYTHING you want. If it's bad I just won't answer so feel free to ask any crazy questions as anonymous if you want, I won't mind.
Everyone take care and I hope you are all enjoying the Spring!
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Reporter needing help
I have a reporter who wrote to me looking for someone to do a story or show on pregnancy and poly. I can't do it but anyone want to? Let me know and I will send your info to her. She is from Discovery Channel.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Robyn's Questions
If Steve were suddenly not there (as in BigLove) would you wives all stay together as a family unit and raise your children together? Or is Steve what holds the family together and if he weren't there you would simply be single mothers and drift appart over time? Robyn
I am sorry but we don't get HBO. Christie bought the first season of Big Love on DVD and it was just too much drama. There were things in it that were just not right but I guess that makes a good TV show.
If Steve were not there then we are taken care of financially and at this point I think all three of us would stay together at least for a while. The church tends to want widows to remarry and maybe...? I don't know. I hope it never comes up. But with the three of us our kids tie us all together and I don't ever see us drifting apart.
Thank you for the really good questions!
I am sorry but we don't get HBO. Christie bought the first season of Big Love on DVD and it was just too much drama. There were things in it that were just not right but I guess that makes a good TV show.
If Steve were not there then we are taken care of financially and at this point I think all three of us would stay together at least for a while. The church tends to want widows to remarry and maybe...? I don't know. I hope it never comes up. But with the three of us our kids tie us all together and I don't ever see us drifting apart.
Thank you for the really good questions!
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Candice's Question
From Candice:
I had a bit of a question: I follow a lot of Muslim blogs and polygamy is coming up SO MUCH lately. I really see the contrast between the life they lead and your's. As you might know, polygamy in Islam is a bit different. It's normally not a big family like your's, but more about a husband going from one home to the other, both wives and her children living separately from each other. What do you feel are the advantages and disadvantages of both situations? Would you give up the sisterhood you have with your wives and the "big family" feel to have more of a one-on-one relationship with husband and only only you, him and your children to take care of?
I guess I am used to this and I really like it. But it could be hard if you didn't like your sisterwives and maybe that's something the Muslims think about. I also think the Muslim men don't want to be outnumbered in the house. Steve sometimes has to deal with the fact that three women will sometimes outvote his opinion and sometimes he will say he doesn't want something to happen and we all do it anyway.
Two years ago when I was thinking about this (I just had my 2nd Anniversary! Yay!) a big thing that made me want to do this was the thing that I would not be alone with a man but would have another woman to have as a friend in the house. It was a million percent different when I got married than what I thought it would be but I am still sure about this one part and I love my sisterwives and would never want to be living alone without them.
I had a bit of a question: I follow a lot of Muslim blogs and polygamy is coming up SO MUCH lately. I really see the contrast between the life they lead and your's. As you might know, polygamy in Islam is a bit different. It's normally not a big family like your's, but more about a husband going from one home to the other, both wives and her children living separately from each other. What do you feel are the advantages and disadvantages of both situations? Would you give up the sisterhood you have with your wives and the "big family" feel to have more of a one-on-one relationship with husband and only only you, him and your children to take care of?
I guess I am used to this and I really like it. But it could be hard if you didn't like your sisterwives and maybe that's something the Muslims think about. I also think the Muslim men don't want to be outnumbered in the house. Steve sometimes has to deal with the fact that three women will sometimes outvote his opinion and sometimes he will say he doesn't want something to happen and we all do it anyway.
Two years ago when I was thinking about this (I just had my 2nd Anniversary! Yay!) a big thing that made me want to do this was the thing that I would not be alone with a man but would have another woman to have as a friend in the house. It was a million percent different when I got married than what I thought it would be but I am still sure about this one part and I love my sisterwives and would never want to be living alone without them.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
A really good question
This was from Anonymous:
Hi Megan, I enjoy reading your posts and I'm glad you've found the love / family situation that works for you! I have a question that I've kind of always wondered about poly families and I thought you might be able to answer it or give an educated guess because you know a lot more families than I do. How many of the families that you know are truly making it on their own (by that I mean the husband is supporting everyone) as compared to how many have all the unmarried (in the legal sense) wives receiving welfare benefits? I know that's a typical criticism of poly families, that most of the family is just receiving welfare and I'm curious if you think it's true or if most of the families you know are truly supporting themselves. (no judgment intended, just genuinely curious) Best wishes to your family, hope spring is right around the corner!
I am sure I wrote about this before but I don't mind answering this again.
In our church couples don't take another person into their family unless they are 100% debt free and have some money put away. There are no set rules about that because things happen and the rules are not going to get in the way of doing the right thing, meaning the right thing to do is always the right thing to do regardless of the rules. Like how Jesus and the Apostles healed people on the Sabbath. The rules said you're not supposed to do that but it was the right thing to do.
But mostly the rule is obeyed and only a family that can provide for a new person is accepted in doing that. Like some people ask if my family will ever add a fourth wife and that is not going to happen that I can imagine even if we wanted to. We're pretty tight on money and that will not change that I can see so it's not something to worry about.
Families that have problems get help from the church and the church has a reserve fund for that kind of thing. Our old congregation had the goal of being able to support all of our families for a year and they met that goal. Our new congregation is not doing as well and it will be a while before we get to being able to support everyone for a year. But if a family has a hard time the church does the support first because we do not want attention from anyone.
I do know some poly people are anti-American and they take welfare and call it 'bleeding the beast' and we absolutely would NEVER do that! I also have some friends online who are FLDS and they tell me they don't do that either.
I also know I never would have done this if it meant going on welfare to make things happen. Not like I am down on people who get welfare, it's just if I have a choice I don't want to be one of them.
Hi Megan, I enjoy reading your posts and I'm glad you've found the love / family situation that works for you! I have a question that I've kind of always wondered about poly families and I thought you might be able to answer it or give an educated guess because you know a lot more families than I do. How many of the families that you know are truly making it on their own (by that I mean the husband is supporting everyone) as compared to how many have all the unmarried (in the legal sense) wives receiving welfare benefits? I know that's a typical criticism of poly families, that most of the family is just receiving welfare and I'm curious if you think it's true or if most of the families you know are truly supporting themselves. (no judgment intended, just genuinely curious) Best wishes to your family, hope spring is right around the corner!
I am sure I wrote about this before but I don't mind answering this again.
In our church couples don't take another person into their family unless they are 100% debt free and have some money put away. There are no set rules about that because things happen and the rules are not going to get in the way of doing the right thing, meaning the right thing to do is always the right thing to do regardless of the rules. Like how Jesus and the Apostles healed people on the Sabbath. The rules said you're not supposed to do that but it was the right thing to do.
But mostly the rule is obeyed and only a family that can provide for a new person is accepted in doing that. Like some people ask if my family will ever add a fourth wife and that is not going to happen that I can imagine even if we wanted to. We're pretty tight on money and that will not change that I can see so it's not something to worry about.
Families that have problems get help from the church and the church has a reserve fund for that kind of thing. Our old congregation had the goal of being able to support all of our families for a year and they met that goal. Our new congregation is not doing as well and it will be a while before we get to being able to support everyone for a year. But if a family has a hard time the church does the support first because we do not want attention from anyone.
I do know some poly people are anti-American and they take welfare and call it 'bleeding the beast' and we absolutely would NEVER do that! I also have some friends online who are FLDS and they tell me they don't do that either.
I also know I never would have done this if it meant going on welfare to make things happen. Not like I am down on people who get welfare, it's just if I have a choice I don't want to be one of them.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Heidi's Questions
Heidi, Thanks for giving me something to write!
1. Describe a day in the life at your farm with your family.
I'm usually up around 5am to get breakfast going unless it was my night to sleep in with Steve or to sleep in by myself and then I will get up around 7 or so. If I'm doing breakfast I get it prepped and on the table for 6:30 and that's right about when everyone else is up. By 7:30 the kitchen is clean and I'm either with the babies or the chickens collecting eggs for the day. After that I usually bake bread or prep for lunch and somewhere in that I take about an hour to be with my girls. Noon time and it's lunch and that lasts about 30 minutes or so and then it is back to babies or out to feed the cattle. After those chores are done I take another hour with my babies and then it's time to start dinner. Dinner is usually on the table at 6pm and it's cleaned up by 7pm. Then it is time to sit with the family and we talk or sometimes watch movies or something family friendly on TV. Sometimes we are out to the hot tub at night and I'll soak my feet since I can't be in there for now. Then bed time is around 9 to 10 and I usually go for 10 and feed the girls a little before bed so they sleep all night.
2. Now that you've been married a while, describe how your marriage is different from what you thought it would be (before you moved into the family home), and/or how much it's like what you thought it would be.
I am not sure what I thought it would be like before. I really didn't think of the marriage part I mostly just thought of the babies and not living at home with my mom part. That sounds pretty bad and it is pretty bad. I think I was doing things just because they were things to do and I didn't think about them as much as I should have. My wedding night was the start of a very long reality check. In a lot of ways I think it is a lot better than I thought it would be because I have gotten to know and love everyone and this is the best and most loved I've ever been. It's hard to explain but there is this warm feeling in my heart now that was never there before and I hope it never changes.
3. Tell us a funny story about what it's like to live in such a big family (I bet all those kids do some romping together).
I don't really have any stories but maybe a lot of little 'pictures'. Like getting busy with Steve in the kitchen and getting caught. Skinny dipping in the pool for the first time. Sleeping with Macy or Christie and feeling really close to them. Having one of Steve's daughters slip into my bed at night to be close to me because they love me. Having four babies and two toddlers crying all at the same time and no one else is around to help. Finding my first chicken killed by a coyote. Laughing around the dinner table as a big family. Thanksgiving. Christmas Eve and everyone dressed for church. Birthdays and LOTS of them! Chatting in the kitchen with a teenager about things that I did a few years ago as a teenager. Feeling so much older than I did two years ago. Quilting and enjoying it and not missing the city. Church picnics with lots of happy families. Showering with someone else and realizing you didn't think about it. Trusting someone with everything.
Cryng right now because I am so happy!
1. Describe a day in the life at your farm with your family.
I'm usually up around 5am to get breakfast going unless it was my night to sleep in with Steve or to sleep in by myself and then I will get up around 7 or so. If I'm doing breakfast I get it prepped and on the table for 6:30 and that's right about when everyone else is up. By 7:30 the kitchen is clean and I'm either with the babies or the chickens collecting eggs for the day. After that I usually bake bread or prep for lunch and somewhere in that I take about an hour to be with my girls. Noon time and it's lunch and that lasts about 30 minutes or so and then it is back to babies or out to feed the cattle. After those chores are done I take another hour with my babies and then it's time to start dinner. Dinner is usually on the table at 6pm and it's cleaned up by 7pm. Then it is time to sit with the family and we talk or sometimes watch movies or something family friendly on TV. Sometimes we are out to the hot tub at night and I'll soak my feet since I can't be in there for now. Then bed time is around 9 to 10 and I usually go for 10 and feed the girls a little before bed so they sleep all night.
2. Now that you've been married a while, describe how your marriage is different from what you thought it would be (before you moved into the family home), and/or how much it's like what you thought it would be.
I am not sure what I thought it would be like before. I really didn't think of the marriage part I mostly just thought of the babies and not living at home with my mom part. That sounds pretty bad and it is pretty bad. I think I was doing things just because they were things to do and I didn't think about them as much as I should have. My wedding night was the start of a very long reality check. In a lot of ways I think it is a lot better than I thought it would be because I have gotten to know and love everyone and this is the best and most loved I've ever been. It's hard to explain but there is this warm feeling in my heart now that was never there before and I hope it never changes.
3. Tell us a funny story about what it's like to live in such a big family (I bet all those kids do some romping together).
I don't really have any stories but maybe a lot of little 'pictures'. Like getting busy with Steve in the kitchen and getting caught. Skinny dipping in the pool for the first time. Sleeping with Macy or Christie and feeling really close to them. Having one of Steve's daughters slip into my bed at night to be close to me because they love me. Having four babies and two toddlers crying all at the same time and no one else is around to help. Finding my first chicken killed by a coyote. Laughing around the dinner table as a big family. Thanksgiving. Christmas Eve and everyone dressed for church. Birthdays and LOTS of them! Chatting in the kitchen with a teenager about things that I did a few years ago as a teenager. Feeling so much older than I did two years ago. Quilting and enjoying it and not missing the city. Church picnics with lots of happy families. Showering with someone else and realizing you didn't think about it. Trusting someone with everything.
Cryng right now because I am so happy!
Thursday, February 17, 2011
February 17, 2011
Just an update since I have some time right now:
Steve's daughter Stevie and her husband are going to be moving here to live with us in the guest house around the end of the month. Their home was being foreclosed on and the bank would not work with them so they negotiated to just leave at the end of the month instead of getting evicted. Stevie's husband lost his job and that messed things up for them and then we can't afford to do anything for them so the only thing left is to have them move here. It will be nice to have Stevie with us again but this was not the best way to do that.
It's been cloudy and will be cloudy with snow all week and I am starting to miss the better weather in California. But that's all I miss there!
My church has had two visitors lately. Lydia is visiting with a family and she decided to stay and so they're doing a wedding at church on Sunday for them and that will be nice. We also have a FLDS boy (he's 19 I think) who came in to the shelter in Denver and has moved in with a family up here. The family is going to help him get himself set up so he is not homeless anymore. He's really nice and I am hoping he stays on in town after he gets a job and all.
Steve sold his airplane because he says it was too expensive anymore to just sit in a hangar and then without a lot of work right now he doesn't need it. Macy, Christie, and me we don't miss the plane because we always worried about him flying around in it and now he's just going to use an airline when he needs to get somewhere.
My pregnancy is going so easy this time. I didn't realize how hard it was the first time until now.
Patty and Laura are doing really well. Christie has been home and she spends a lot of time with all of the babies teaching them and she's got Eric starting to read now and that is so cool! I don't think I did any reading until I was 6 or 7.
The chickens are doing good. We put in some lights in the barn for them and that got them laying more so we are leaving the lights on 16 hours a day for them.
I finished another quilt and it will be a wedding gift for Lydia. I did a quilt with chickens on it. (-:
Things are going on so I have to go but there is most of what is going on right now.
Steve's daughter Stevie and her husband are going to be moving here to live with us in the guest house around the end of the month. Their home was being foreclosed on and the bank would not work with them so they negotiated to just leave at the end of the month instead of getting evicted. Stevie's husband lost his job and that messed things up for them and then we can't afford to do anything for them so the only thing left is to have them move here. It will be nice to have Stevie with us again but this was not the best way to do that.
It's been cloudy and will be cloudy with snow all week and I am starting to miss the better weather in California. But that's all I miss there!
My church has had two visitors lately. Lydia is visiting with a family and she decided to stay and so they're doing a wedding at church on Sunday for them and that will be nice. We also have a FLDS boy (he's 19 I think) who came in to the shelter in Denver and has moved in with a family up here. The family is going to help him get himself set up so he is not homeless anymore. He's really nice and I am hoping he stays on in town after he gets a job and all.
Steve sold his airplane because he says it was too expensive anymore to just sit in a hangar and then without a lot of work right now he doesn't need it. Macy, Christie, and me we don't miss the plane because we always worried about him flying around in it and now he's just going to use an airline when he needs to get somewhere.
My pregnancy is going so easy this time. I didn't realize how hard it was the first time until now.
Patty and Laura are doing really well. Christie has been home and she spends a lot of time with all of the babies teaching them and she's got Eric starting to read now and that is so cool! I don't think I did any reading until I was 6 or 7.
The chickens are doing good. We put in some lights in the barn for them and that got them laying more so we are leaving the lights on 16 hours a day for them.
I finished another quilt and it will be a wedding gift for Lydia. I did a quilt with chickens on it. (-:
Things are going on so I have to go but there is most of what is going on right now.
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